As you all might have read - Blanca was in labor last night. She is my BE Registered doe that I was really wanting to keep a BE buckling out of for a Jr. Herd Sire for next year as I sold off the sire to these kids. Anyway, things were going nicely. I had put in my post about 11:30 last night that hubby was giving me crap about being in the barn and was mad at me. So, I went to bed and sset my alarm for 2 hours later - (1 am). I got up at 1 - went and checked on her - and she was doing good - but did not seem like she was pushing yet - so I went back to bed. I felt so guilty that my husband was upset that I wanted to be in the barn and with Blanca being a seasoned doe, I decided to not reset my alarm for 3. I got up at 6 am and went to the barn to check on her. I could see through the slats as I walked up a little one and momma. Then I found what I didn't want to see ----- 3 dead kids :cry: :cry: . My heart dropped and I instantly started crying. I knew in my gut I needed to be with her - but I didn't stand up for myself to my husband. The kid that lived is doing well it is a brown eyed buckling. He is black and white spotted and I will make a post introducing him. The 3 that passed were: Doeling - black and white spotted / brown eyes - HUGE! buckling - black and white spotted / brown eyes buckling - white - blue eyes (exactly what I wanted!) Here is a pic of the ones that passed. You can definately see the size difference in the doeling compared to the others. I am just so thankful I had at least 1 that survived.
Allison, I am so sorry! They look to be good sized and should have thrived, totally possible that they were coming one right after the other and she couldn't get to them fast enough to clear their little faces. Such a tragedy, hopefully the surviving boy does well. Surprising that she had quads in there, she really didn't look "big enough". Don't beat yourself up, these things happen for a reason, there may even have been something wrong with the 3 that you can't see, love on Blanca and her little boy, as I'm sure she's grieving too
:tears: I know the guilt and the pain you are going through. That was something I didnt even do (only liz pmed me and pried it out of me). I am so so sorry :grouphug: Make sure you grieve for them -- it really does help. Trying to tell yourself that it was ment to be or that they wouldnt' have survived even if you werent there does not help. Just sit there and cry. After that go and hug the little fellow with all your might.
I truely believe that woman have "intuition" that should not be ignored. If your gut tells you to be in the barn, then be in the barn. Men just don't get it sometimes. I'm so sorry for your loss. Have a good cry, it's such a stress reliever, and I fully support it.
I am so sorry this happened. It could have been worse, there may have been no live babies or you could have even lost Blanca. I'm glad she did get a live baby to love. There could have easily been other reason's those kids didn't make it. Even reasons you couldn't have changed if you'd been there. I've been present at births and still lost kids. Cords breaking before being born and kids presenting head first and having a horrible strain trying to breath. Nothing you can do to change the outcome. Just be glad your live baby is doing well and if you have to rub it in your hubby's face to show the importance of being there. If he won't see reason in the respect of life or death then tell him about the money lost just by not being present. Men sometimes won't see things the way we do but they always listen when money is involved. I hope you don't beat yourself up over this. I'm so glad Blanca and her little buckling did survive. Cuddle them both from me too! :grouphug:
Oh Allison, so so so sorry to hear that. I'm soooooo sorry you lost your blue eyed buckling, but at least you know next time she'll be likely to have one! I'm really surprised she had 4 in there, goodness! At least you have your little buckling!! And good thing momma is ok! It could be that something was wrong with the kids that died. They're probably more likely to have problems and strength issues since they were quads.
thank you all - I am so "B&*^" today over all of this today and everytime someone asks what is wrong I am about in tears. I am just so mad that I was not there and could make sure that they were breathing. I THREW it in my husband's face this morning how much money we are out - BUT my thing was is that I am trained to save the lives of animals - and I take this very personal that I didn't save their lives. I feel responsible like you can not believe. I feel like I let down Blanca and that I did not take my animals to heart. I know that sounds stupid - but that is how I feel. Look what I did for Mini that was born a couple weeks ago. I worked on her for 30 minutes, was able to save her and find her a great home with a little girl that just loves her! Anyway - thank you all
I'm so sorry for your loss, I know how hard it is, but sometimes you just have to come to the fact that they aren't always meant to be
I am so sorry I know you would have been there if you would have known. BUT there is no way anyone could have known what would happen. And Ashley is right, even if you were there they may have been born with broken cords, or stillborn for other reasons. Do you have a baby monitor? It is such a life saver and saves you un-needed trips to the barn. Chelsey
I actually don't mind sitting in the barn. I actually love it - it is so peaceful to me. I will be buying a monitor for sure. With the air conditioner and fans - I can't hear a thing. Typically I can hear any noise from my bedroom that comes from my barn or the dogs wake me up. I know it is "not my fault" but I so feel like it is. Unfortunately, that thought will never ever leave me.
Allison, that thought may never leave you, but it will not always be the first in your mind and heart as that little one grows and thrives, enjoy the lucky little man and know that Blanca is just happy having a baby to care for. I agree that a moniter is #1 in my kidding list.....and now my hubby wants to add a camera to the stalls...believe that one? It was his idea so I'm not in and out at every noise I hear....well if things go the way I want he has til next March to install it, if not I'll happily do as I've always done...sleep with the moniter next to my pillow. I hope you are able to get some rest and be able to sleep, hubby knows now it was wrong of him to give you grief, it may take a bit for it to sink in though.
Oh I love sitting out there too. But I don't like waking up in the middle of the night to check on them. I listen to the monitor and watch the barn cam most of the time during kidding season. If I have a doe who looks like she is going into labor I can't sleep anyways so I wait out there with her. Love on that adorable little one and it will make everything seem OK.
Baby monitors are good but sometimes with multiples the does still don't make any noise. I love to sit in the barn too with expecting moms but sometimes that's not possible with daily chores, children and a hubby. I do it when I can though.
Yep, sometimes they don't make much noise but usually there is SOME sort of noise they make be it grunting or pawing the ground before they lay down to push. That is why I like the camera too.
If they give me signs that something is going to happen soon...or not...I get my important stuff done and will leave hubby a note letting him know where, why and who...my luck has been late winter births where I'm sitting and freezing my toes and butt off and leave the barn long enough to get more coffee and give hubby a progress report. He even listens on the moniter and laughs at me when I "coach" my girls...he loves them too Sitting and comforting a doe in labor is my favorite thing to do and no matter how cold it is outside I still love to do it. Next year I hope to have March/April kids as opposed to January/February! Allison, you still have a few does to go yet and plenty of lovins to give each of them when they need it, any chance for BE kids with the next girls?
no, no more BE. I only had the one BE (I could only afford 1 this year). I have 2 Boer X girls, a pygmy, and 1 Reg Nigerian left to kid - ALL this month!
I just wanted you to know how sorry I am - that would have been heart wrenching for you. I am so glad that momma still has one little dude to take care of - hope he does really well.
Allison,don't feel bad it wasn'rt your fault.I know everyone is saying it and it still doesn't change what happened but it is ok to feel the way that you do.Just know things will get better.
