Friend in need - update :(

Discussion in 'The Chatter Box' started by StaceyRosado, Mar 8, 2010.

  1. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    I am so upset right now

    a dear friend is in a terrible situation. She needs out NOW but doesnt have the courage to make it happen at this point.

    She also needs a place to live to bring her goats with her.

    I dont know how to encourage her more then I already have -- if anyone has ideas for how she can find a rental property for her and her goats I would GREATLY appreciate it.

    If she could take her goats that she has worked so hard to acquire that would totally booster her spirits. But she is getting to the point where she thinks she should just sell all and move in with her mom. This would just destroy her even more.

    Please help in anyway you know how. Thank you
     
  2. citylights

    citylights Member

    824
    Jul 3, 2009
    Southern California
    Re: Friend in need

    Ugh, that doesn't sound good... is she in New Jersey? Is there anyway she find a spot for her goaties til she gets settled/gets her problems resolved? Poor thing. That;'s a lot to have to deal with.......
     

  3. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    yah in NJ

    I found 2 places on Craigs List that might be promising but it means she has to contact the people and actually make it happen. She says yes I know Stacey. But then doesnt follow through. Its a sad situation. I almost feel like i need to make the contact with the people and then set up a time for both of us and her mom to go to the places or it wont ever happen.

    As a person she is slowly fading away and resigning herself to this existence - its so frustrating I wish I could do something about it and I guess thats why I am up reading CL at 12:45am!
     
  4. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    this is the one place I found that I am SO hoping works out

    http://southjersey.craigslist.org/grd/1634908505.html

    "6 stall horse barn self care only water and electric out to barn $500 a month "


    And then she can move in with her mother till she can work out a more permanent home for herself and the goats.

    Please be praying with me :pray: I contacted them to see if we can come over and see if the place will suit

    My friend's place is where i board my bucks - so I have a lot riding on this too. I dont want to have to sell them :sigh:
     
  5. cdtrum

    cdtrum New Member

    Aug 25, 2008
    Northern Indiana
    Re: Friend in need

    Oh Stacey....what a great friend you are :hug: ......finding myself in a bad situation several years ago I can say there is only so much you can do, she ultimatly has to be the one to stand on her own 2 feet and get out of her current situation which can become very frustrating for you.....but being so supportive and encouraging to her is very good. I had the wonderful loving support and help of my family and friends, but I was the one that had to take the leap and make things happen.

    Back then I had to give up my dogs and cats, which is the only animals I had.....it was so very hard and heartbreaking, but I also had 2 small children to think of.......I have to say looking back, that time of my life was sooooo liberating! I am so thankful that I did it and learned to stand on my own, although it was such a scary and uncertain time.....it made me a much more stronger, independent woman.

    Hang in there and I pray for your friend to find her way and to be able to keep her goats...... when I was going through it, I would pray and pray every day and night for the good Lord to show me the way.....God is good!
     
  6. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    that person emailed me back -- said goats are fine!! barn recently had a new roof put on and it already has fencing -- now to see if it has electric fencing as well or if we need to put cattle pannels up (its only rail fencing).

    Oh my I am feeling so overwhelmed with this offer - God is so good.

    Then another offer came in from my request for a land to lease -- said she can fence in 2 acres for goats with a 10x10 shed on 20some acres of land. dont know about water or electric but wow God just keeps saying I will provide!

    He told me last night that it would all work out but I was having trouble believing Him -- oh me of little faith!

    its not a done deal but its progress. She didnt think it was possible -- here I can show her it is possible! :D so its a step in the right direction. I am stoked
     
  7. creekbottomgoats

    creekbottomgoats Member

    78
    Dec 2, 2009
    Mississippi
    Re: Friend in need

    Praise God!! Ask and you shall receive...

    God Bless you Stacey. I will be praying for you and your friend.

    Connie
     
  8. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    thank you -- each step in the right direction is a blessing and she needs every prayer she can get to take those steps
     
  9. OhCee

    OhCee Yak Lady

    609
    Feb 26, 2010
    Western MT
    Re: Friend in need

    That's great :) I'll be praying for you and your friend (and the goaties!) for sure!
     
  10. sweetgoats

    sweetgoats Moderator

    Oct 18, 2007
    Peyton CO.
    Re: Friend in need

    Stacey, I will be praying for your friend. It is hard to take that leap and leave whatever she is in. It is scary to do so, but I will pray that the lord will give her the strength to do what is best for her. I will pray that she will ask him for guidance and she will receive his help. :pray: :pray:
     
  11. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    I just spoke with her -- gave her some good news and she says she is going to do it. So I am real excited. This means a whole new life for her.
    She has another place she is looking at thats real promising - its so God working this out for her. I just pray it happens soon before she gets cold feet. I am not the only one telling her this. Her brother says let me know I will help you move the goats, her mom is like move in with me :)

    What blessing

    Thank you guys for your prayers.
     
  12. toth boer goats

    toth boer goats Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Jul 20, 2008
    Corning California
    Re: Friend in need

    :pray: :hug: That is terrific.... :clap: :leap: :cool: :wahoo: :stars:
     
  13. myfainters

    myfainters New Member

    Oct 29, 2009
    Lancaster, CA
    Re: Friend in need

    That is great news!! I hope that it works out for her and I'm praying that the Lord will give her the strength to make this huge decision! :)
     
  14. WalnutGroveFarm

    WalnutGroveFarm Senior Member

    Sep 27, 2008
    Southern Ohio
    Re: Friend in need

    Stacey you are such a great friend to her. Prayers that she can make this decsion and go through with it.
     
  15. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    Right now she wants to get legal council before she makes any final decision but she is still going to go through with it. Just wants to make sure she doesnt do something stupid that will bite her in the end.
     
  16. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    Re: Friend in need

    :sigh: she is staying :GAAH: why cant she see :(

    Lord please help her see he wont change no matter how much he says he will :pray:
     
  17. 4kids

    4kids New Member

    844
    Jul 21, 2009
    Re: Friend in need

    Stacey- that is so hard. Is this the friend that recently lost a loved one also? The best thing you can do is be a supportive friend. Love her through it all! I am sure she feels everyone is judging her. Be her rock! I had this happen to a good friend and it was heartbreaking to watch!!!!!
     
  18. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    one in the same - thanks Jen I am just having a hard time being up beat for her when she keeps shooting herself in the foot! its like enough already.

    She keeps saying how she will have to sell out of her goats or sell down to just a couple (she even has less then me now)-- but her daughter can have 3 horses.....how is that fair. UGH it drives me insane
     
  19. 4kids

    4kids New Member

    844
    Jul 21, 2009
    I noticed in my friend's case there was a part of her that enjoyed (in the sickest way) being "punished". Not always physically, but verbally or sometimes just having to do without something. She almost felt she wasn't worth more or that others deserved better. It was very hard to keep being a support when part of the issue was a mindset that had developed long before she began a relationship. Agh! I feel your pain.
     
  20. StaceyRosado

    StaceyRosado Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Oct 4, 2007
    NJ
    I think thats the case too

    seh says "I am dead inside he cant hurt me" UH YES HE CAN! obviously he is hurting her or she wouldnt be sharing it with me. But her mindset is that its ok, I just have to deal with it.

    anyway I am workign on a plan with her now -- well lets just say I am suggesting another idea that may fit into her new decision but keep the peace.