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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Sorry I need to vent...
Yesterday I had to go out of town to photograph some horse races <nightracing>.
My son knows how much feed to give their goats.

So I wake up this morning to find out not only were they not fed right, they aren't where they should be either!
All because of my husband :rolleyes:

The kids 4-H wethers have a place and their 3 young does go in their stalls at night. Oldest doeling/youngest doeling go in a stall together so the youngest always has grain available through the night, and the other doeling gets her own stall and has grain too.

But no..... HE took over feeding them from my son last night and only gave 3 cups to 6 young goats!! that's not even 3 full pounds! <% Boer goats>.
The two adult does that my kids show didn't even get 2 cups between them!
:mad::wallbang::veryangry:

I am so mad!!! Work so hard trying to get some weight on these goats, and keep them in shape and then he goes and changes everything just because he thinks he's saving a little grain.

Now I am worried about this coming weekend. I'm supposed to take the kids and go see my family, and I'm afraid he won't feed them the way they are supposed to be fed.

So...I'm shortening my trip, so there is one day I can't do anything about, but at least can feed them in the morning we're leaving, and the evening we get home.

Anyone else have this problem? It's so frustrating. I could leave him a list and he'd still ignore it thinking he is feeding them right. :mad:
 

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I'm not addicted - I'm in love!
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Look on the bright side. It's better than giving too much! :) What if you were to tell him specifically rather than writing it down?
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I wish I could do that, but he still wouldn't feed them right :( He works with horses, and 'thinks' he knows everything about feeding the goats :( I told him he can't compare them to the horses - they have huge, lush pastures, and better grain/hay, and well horses are so much different than goats.
We have no real grazing, constantly battling worms, and not high quality show type feed/hay. What I feed is a minimum for them.

I'd gladly measure everything out if he'd actually go by that. He just thinks his way of feeding is better than mine :(
 

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sounds like you can leave during critical times OR hire someone to come and feed the way you want. But even that is NOT a guarantee! Ive learned that no one will do it the way I do. No matter HOW MUCH I show them tell them or write it down.
 

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7 does - 2 bucks - 1 wether
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My dad is the same way. My mom and sister know exactly what to do, what to feed, etc, so that is wonderful we all have each other's back when one of us needs to leave. But my dad ... no one wants to have to ask him for help with the animals. :laugh: Good guy, but he always thinks he can "improve" upon our plan, and I'm afraid to leave them alone with him. :laugh:
 

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(I should really proofread before I hit send. lol. By cow I meant cowsssss)

I have one of those husbands too. I have a neighbor that will come feed for me. I just play it off..."honey, I know you are really busy at work so the neighbor said she would come feed for me" He farms so he puts in really long hours. My critters get fed correctly and he feels like I am doing him a favor. Truly, I am helping him out so its a win win. ;)
 

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I had that happen to me once. I had to be gone for a day (2 milkings) I told my mom and two friends who were going to be milking and feeding what to feed how much and who gets milked. When I got back I find out they fed the milkers the kid feed (medicated goat grain) and the kids the milker feed (sweet goat feed). It just made me want to :hair: and :hammer:

Is there any way you could put out the night feeding for the goats in their stalls? Or do they have access to the stalls all the time?
 

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I feel your pain. He complains I'm married to the property yet won't help with the feeding. He'll throw hay but that's about it. I'm hand milking 2 goats a day so I have to be here. As it is he wants a 2-3 day vacation between mid aug and mid oct. I have NOONE to help milk in the area (paid or not) so I end up having to dry my does off early for a 2-3 trip.He tells my I'm crazy and the animal people I deal with are too, just because I don't take on an animal unless I can give it the best I can. He knew how many animals I had when he met me!
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Thanks, I wish I knew someone I could ask to feed them, but nobody nearby that I could rely on. I think our neighbor is out of town visiting family as well.

They don't have access to the stalls once they are put outside for the day, but can't put feed in the feeders because it draws in rodents.

I haven't gone home to see my family in a very long time. So I won't cancel my trip, but I won't extend it either :(
This is kind of our last big family gathering at my dads as tomorrow morning I believe his house/land will officially be sold and he is moving to Florida. His place has always been the gathering place especially during the summers. Going to miss it so much. But he'll also be further away so it'll be harder to go see him.
 

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Everytime my hubby goes out he changes things!! I have to remind him that he cant just march in and change things up..he is not the daily care taker and does not know the animals the way I do...lol..something as simple as trying to move the sheep through the wrong gate can run havec!! they like routine!! lol
this would be alot of work but how about premearure feed out and label them by dates and AM/PM and for who...lots of baggies lol...make it out like you are saving him work..all he has to do is dump the feed in the right feeder..??
When I have to leave home I leave a prayer....
 

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Oh, ya'll make me laugh!:ROFL: At first I was getting frustrated for you all b/c I have the exact same problems!!!! Then by the end of reading it all, I just had to laugh!
It's always like that around here; for a long time me and my sister were the ONLY ones who knew anything about the animals feeding- we were the only ones who did the animal chores, too. Now our brother helps out more, but I sometimes think he thinks it's unmanly to remember details or something, I don't know, he's so bad at it!
He hauls the hay and grain bags, we take turns checking the goats midday when its hot, and he helps milk too.
But now that I've slowly evolved into "the goat person" around here, nobody else know how to feed them.
I write it all down, and leave it in the cabinet where the pail is so they can't help but see it, run through it at least once with them both (my bro. and sis)- then I ask them every so often; do you remember how much we're feeding the goats now? and they're like yeah!!!, so I let it go for a week or two-don't want to nag- and then I start noticing that the goats are looking a little thin, or a little fat, so I ask again: Are you sure you're giving the right amount of this or that and they'll be like, remind me again what it was? So I tell them witha sinking feeling in my stomach, and they're like Since when did we change the feeding again? I've been giving them this or that much like we were always doing! :doh:
I don't think they read what I write down more than once.

The other day I asked my brother to take some extra alfalfa over to the bucks to have on hand (they're quite a ways from the doe pen where we keep most of the grain and such) So I said "Put it in their feed bucket"- we have an old 25 lb lard bucket that we store it in right now- it was about 3 pounds of alfalfa, and he fed all of it to the 2 bucks right then!!!!!:eek: One buck is a Nigerian, the other is 3 months old!
And I fed them again later, because I didn't know! I just though, huh, they're fat today; oh well, and fed them more alfalfa, and BOSS and grain to the young one. I was so mad when I realized the next day (because the alfalfa that I sent him over with was not there) He said "You told me to put it in their feed bucket!" He though I meant feed TROUGH. :GAAH:
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Cathy, I wish I could premeasure, but my husband is very stubborn and will just ignore and still do it 'his way.' We do not see eye to eye on the care of the animals. If it were him, they'd get almost nothing every day.

I feel your pain. He complains I'm married to the property yet won't help with the feeding. He'll throw hay but that's about it. I'm hand milking 2 goats a day so I have to be here. As it is he wants a 2-3 day vacation between mid aug and mid oct. I have NOONE to help milk in the area (paid or not) so I end up having to dry my does off early for a 2-3 trip.He tells my I'm crazy and the animal people I deal with are too, just because I don't take on an animal unless I can give it the best I can. He knew how many animals I had when he met me!
I'm sorry, I totally understand though. My husband is like a brick wall at times. We should be working together on taking care of the goats, but no, he thinks it has to be his way or my way. If it's my way then he refuses to help and doesn't want to do anything with them. The only thing he does is graze them up front once in a while.
When I ask him to help me with the kids/training their goats, typically he doesn't want to.
If the goats are sick and need meds, etc. <not very often at all thankfully!> I have to get the meds and I have to be the one to take care of them. He always says I am over reacting. It makes me so mad :(
I have been buying most all of the grain for months, once in a while he has to buy some.
So when I say something about grain, and he doesn't like it <like increasing a little on goats who are getting bigger!>, he comes off and says they don't need it and he won't help me get the grain anymore, etc. etc. He says if I want fat animals I should buy a pig! OMG! really?
These are the kids 4-H animals, they are supposed to have good cover on them. They get minimum as it is, there are only 2 that have what I call 'good' weight, the others are so/so.

I have to do everything that my kids can't do - hoof trimming, worming, medicating/vaccinating.
So maybe once in a 'blue moon' he'll come out and treat a goat if we suspect lice. He acts like he's doing so much more than I do when he does this.

When we sell a goat, he thinks the $$ has to automatically come to him. Now that's what makes me just as mad as the feeding issue.
Last time we sold goats, I kept 1/2 to use on stuff we needed, the goats before that bought groceries, new clippers for the kids 4-H goats, feed, halters/etc. stuff they needed.

On top of that we have a doe I want to sell. But he wants to keep. He only wants her because she gave us triplets this year. I am looking at the pros/cons of having her. She's a hard keeper, I have to constantly keep an eye on her. The kids have 4 does they are breeding this summer, and 2 in the fall, that is plenty for our small place <2 acres>. We can always replace her next year if we have too.

So lots of little things that nag at me. But, the feeding thing frustrates me more than anything else. Not only are they not getting what they need and spend the night being hungry. He throws off their entire routine, especially by not putting the girls in their stalls. They are used to their routine, no reason for him to screw it up thinking his way is better :(
 

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I am sorry he is like that. When I let my hubby measure out the feed it's never the same but at least its some what close. He knows what they get but he doesn't fill the scoops all the way to the top, he leaves a space. The way I explained it to him was that goats are as sensitive as horses to changes in their diet, if not even more. My hubby knows and understands how serious colic can be and the expenses involved whether or not the level of colic requires vet assistance. Maybe if you explain it that way to your hubby he could understand it a bit more?
 

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You're not alone. I hate leaving this responsibility up to my boyfriend when I'm not home. One time I came home and the goats were out loose in the backyard! They were supposed to be locked in their stalls but he forgot. How can you forget that? I check and then double check to make sure each latch is secured, always. I love him, but sometimes he is too forgetful.
 

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I'm sorry, I totally understand though. My husband is like a brick wall at times. We should be working together on taking care of the goats, but no, he thinks it has to be his way or my way. If it's my way then he refuses to help and doesn't want to do anything with them. The only thing he does is graze them up front once in a while.
When I ask him to help me with the kids/training their goats, typically he doesn't want to.
If the goats are sick and need meds, etc. <not very often at all thankfully!> I have to get the meds and I have to be the one to take care of them. He always says I am over reacting. It makes me so mad :(
I have been buying most all of the grain for months, once in a while he has to buy some.
So when I say something about grain, and he doesn't like it <like increasing a little on goats who are getting bigger!>, he comes off and says they don't need it and he won't help me get the grain anymore, etc. etc. He says if I want fat animals I should buy a pig! OMG! really?
These are the kids 4-H animals, they are supposed to have good cover on them. They get minimum as it is, there are only 2 that have what I call 'good' weight, the others are so/so.

I have to do everything that my kids can't do - hoof trimming, worming, medicating/vaccinating.
So maybe once in a 'blue moon' he'll come out and treat a goat if we suspect lice. He acts like he's doing so much more than I do when he does this.

When we sell a goat, he thinks the $$ has to automatically come to him. Now that's what makes me just as mad as the feeding issue.
Last time we sold goats, I kept 1/2 to use on stuff we needed, the goats before that bought groceries, new clippers for the kids 4-H goats, feed, halters/etc. stuff they needed.

On top of that we have a doe I want to sell. But he wants to keep. He only wants her because she gave us triplets this year. I am looking at the pros/cons of having her. She's a hard keeper, I have to constantly keep an eye on her. The kids have 4 does they are breeding this summer, and 2 in the fall, that is plenty for our small place <2 acres>. We can always replace her next year if we have too.

So lots of little things that nag at me. But, the feeding thing frustrates me more than anything else. Not only are they not getting what they need and spend the night being hungry. He throws off their entire routine, especially by not putting the girls in their stalls. They are used to their routine, no reason for him to screw it up thinking his way is better :(
OH MY GOSH! He sounds exactly like my ex husband! He had always wanted to keep the money from the kids fair animals, or he'd want to sell them all and he keep the money, or whenever I needed help buying the animal feed back then( I didn't have a lot of money, I worked for $5 and hour at a drug store) so when he had to buy it he thought he was the greatest person alive and like he was doing us such a favor.

He was really nice when we got together, he was going to vet school, loved the animals etc. But when we got married he turned into the polar opposite! He quit school, was such a jerk, hated the animals, etc.

But I could go on forever about all that, but I don't want to with all the children on here to see.

But I can't ever go on vacation because of all my animals, I have horses, ponies, cows, calves, pigs, dogs, puppies, chickens, peafowl, parrots, tortoises, so many fish tanks and koi ponds, just so many animals I can never leave. But I am ok with that because I don't like leaving my house, I hate being away from home, anywhere but home just doesnt feel right.
 

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I understand Little Bits and Pieces; I don't like leaving most of the time either. We have goats, a dog, a cat, and a rabbit right now; we usually have ckickens, but we got rid of our old layers and used the old chicken house for a goat barn, so we can't get more till we build a chicken coop.
I don't like leaving our animals at home even for a whole day.
I hope you've got someone to help you with chores! you've got a lot of animals!
 

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My daughter is pretty good at doing a lot of the chores. She feeds and waters all the outside animals, cleans most the pens, takes care of the bottle babies, does some chores in the house. I take care of the parrots, tortoises, fish tanks, ponds, gardens, I take care taking of anything that gets sick, I do vacinations etc. And my husband makes sure all the vehicles are running properly, home improvements, building barns, fences, etc. And my other kids do all the other things here and there.
And I also do one of the most important things ever, that nobody else at my house can seem to do... cook dinner :p
 
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