Just something I got on my FB

Discussion in 'Goat Frenzy' started by GoldenSeal, Nov 5, 2010.

  1. GoldenSeal

    GoldenSeal New Member

    Sep 13, 2010
    Alberta, Canada
    I received this from a friend and though it was hilarious! Just thought I'd share.

    The Doe's Secret Code of Honor

    The doe's secret code of honor is as old as goats themselves and is ultimately the species best kept secret. No doe shall ever kid before its time. (Its time being determined by the following factors):

    1- No kid shall be born until total chaos has been reached by all involved. Your owner's house must be a wreck, their
    family hungry and desperate for clean clothes, and their social life nonexistent.

    2- "Midwives" must reach the babbling fool status before you kid out.Bloodshot eyes, tangled hair and the inability to
    form a sentence mean the time is getting close.

    3- For every bell, beeper, camera or whistle they attach
    to you, kidding must be delayed by at least one day for each an audio monitor, one good yell per hour will keep things interesting.

    4- If you hear the words, "She's nowhere near ready.
    She'll be fine while we're away for the weekend," Wait until they load the car, then begin pushing!

    5- Owner stress must be at an all time high! If you are in the care of someone else, ten to fifteen phone calls a day is a sign you're getting close.

    6- When you hear the words "I can't take it anymore!"
    wait at least three more days.

    7 -You must keep this waiting game interesting. False
    alarms are mandatory! Little teasers such as looking at your
    stomach, pushing your food around in the bucket and then walking away from it, and nesting, are always good for a rise. Be creative and find new things to do to keep the adrenaline pumping in those who wait.

    8- The honor of all goats is now in your hands. Use this time to avenge all of your barn mates. Think about your friend who had to wear that silly costume in front of those people. Hang onto that baby for another day. OH, they made him do tricks too! Three more days seems fair. Late feedings, the dreaded diet, bad haircuts, those awful wormings can also be avenged at this time.

    9- If you have fulfilled all of the above and are still not sure when to have the kids, listen to the weather forecast on
    the radio that has been so generously provided by those who wait. Severe storm warning is what you're waiting for. In the heart of the storm jump into action! The power could go out and you could have the last laugh. You have a good chance of those who wait missing the whole thing while searching
    for a flashlight that works!

    10- Make the most of your interrupted nights. Beg for food each time someone comes into the barn to check you. Your barn mates will love you as the extra goodies fall their way too.
    Remember, this code of honor was designed to remind
    man of how truly special goats are. Do your best to reward those who wait with a beautiful doeling to carry on the Doe Code of Honor for the next generation of those who wait!
  2. TinyHoovesRanch

    TinyHoovesRanch New Member


    Thats exactly what my goats do! hahahaha I love it!

  3. toth boer goats

    toth boer goats Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Jul 20, 2008
    Corning California
    I seen that one.. :wink: ....it is always good and great to read though..... love it.... :thumb: :greengrin:
  4. OhCee

    OhCee Yak Lady

    Feb 26, 2010
    Western MT
    LOL It's not nearly as funny when it's ACTIVELY happening to you! :p
  5. RPC

    RPC Boer Goat Breeder

    I love that it actually happens to me.....too funny but at the same time I hate it bc tracking threw the snow at 4 a.m. just to check on a doe sucks sooooo bad. I hate that all the nite checks happen then they wait till 3 in the afternoon when it warming up just to push it out.
  6. Paige

    Paige Senior Member

    Oct 14, 2010
    I read that in The Dairy Goat Journal once. Its so funny because its TRUE!!!