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I haven't posted in a while, but knew this would be the place to come and ask my questions as I miss this forum!

I do tend to write a book, so here goes...

I am really torn on what to do, and have rewritten this 3 or 4 times now lol.

The horse farm my husband works for is 15 minutes away, but in the near future they are moving to a neighboring county and his commute would turn into at least 30 minutes mostly on the interstate (which scares me!).

They want us to move to the new farm. They are in the process of having 2 new houses completed that are on the edge of the farm, next to a very quiet country road. They built one of them with us in mind.
Taking this offer would mean, no maintenance issues, and most likely all utilities paid (except for extras like phone/internet/satellite).
Downfall would be, leaving everything we are used to - our county, schools, and... we'd have to find a place nearby we could purchase to keep the goats. Since there is a small yard.

They've even offered to help us get our kids into a good private school, or help us figure out a way to commute them back/forth from their current school. I have a senior, sophomore and 4th grader. If they were all younger I'd not worry so much, but my oldest WILL graduate with her friends, and I just don't know that my son and youngest daughter will handle a move from their friends very well :(

We own our place, it's not much, just a couple of acres, and an older double wide modular home that needs work (just more remodeling/finishing inside).
BUT, it's ours.
We've toyed with looking for more land in our area as we really have outgrown this place. However, land in the entire area is really expensive.
I told my husband we'd have to sell this place and buy a place to keep animals, and eventually turn into a 'forever' kind of home, near the farm. But that is easier said than done. Prices in that area are very high. We need something that at least has some kind of a barn.

If we ended up doing that, what are the odds of living in one place, and having our animals about 10-15 minutes away. Does anyone else do it, and does it work?

A big part of me doesn't want to disappoint the owners, but a big part of me doesn't want to give up what we have or want to achieve. It's so very, very hard. I know selling the goats would not go over well with the kids at all, as it wouldn't go over well with me.
Crazy how they affect our lives.

I'm just so confused on the best course of action. I want my oldest kids to enjoy their last years in high school. My youngest has 2 best friends who are like family, and the leisure of doing what you want on your own place.
But I don't want to seem selfish either. I know my husband wants to take their offer, he'd be so close to work, can help during any emergencies, especially during foaling season.

Thanks for any advice, input, or just for reading my rambling, I appreciate it.
 

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We had to live with my in-laws 35 minutes away from our farm for 1 winter when we first had goats. I think we only had 4 at that time and were, thankfully, not kidding during the time we were away. It's very hard to spend the time you want to with them in a situation like that. BUT... the trade off may be worth it for your husband's job security, a brand new home for all of you, and eliminating his commute. It can be very very tricky where we live to keep your children in a school if you don't live in the community, our school districts are very strict about people "abusing" the better school systems by using fake addresses, etc. If I were you, I would be firm on keeping the sophomore and senior in their existing school, but would transfer the 4th grader ASAP and schedule a few weekend sleepovers right away for her best friends.

Best of luck in your decision! It sounds like your husband's employers are generous folks BUT I wish they had considered your lifestyle before "building a house for you"! Now you feel guilty if you do not accept because they didn't consider your livestock. (especially for folks whose whole livelihood is based on animals!)
 

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Fair-Haven
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Oh my! So many things to consider for you. I'm sure none of us can do anything but provide input and experience. My first concern would be - what if this is not a "forever" employment situation for your husband. Things do happen and it would put your family in a very awkward situation financially and in workability.

If it helps, my husband drives about one hour one way to work, and has done so for 30 years. It allows us to have our farm in an affordable area, a community we love, and to pursue all our "farm stuff" for our family and to be here 24/7 for our animals.
Does he love the drive - nope! But he wouldn't trade where he lives for anything. His job also takes him away from home for weeks at a time, so it is just something we are used to.

Everything involves a trade off - it just depends on your priorities and financial situation. Write down pro's, con's on a big sheet of paper, and ask your family about their feelings. In the end, I'm sure it will work out for you.

Blessings to you and yours in this hard decision!
 

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A 30 minute commute is the norm in many parts of the country. In fact, many people would give anything to have it so easy.
I would hang on to your current land and home if I were in your situation. It sounds like your oldest is not too far away from being able to manage her own place, and maybe that might be an option in only a few years. Could she stay there as a live-in house sitter?
If she isn't able to do that, maybe you could find a nearby goat lover who would be willing to rent it and take care of your goats in exchange for having a place for their own animals?

'Just tossing out ideas. I agree with what the others have said. There is no such thing as a forever job, and you could be left in a terrible situation if something bad happens. But, at the same time, for now it seems like your husband''s employer is really going all out to make him happy and it would be a shame to dismiss that effort.
I think a compromise that allows you to keep your own place while letting your husband keep his job would be the ideal - that is, if you can pull it off.
 
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I've had to keep my goats elsewhere several times over the years, and again now, and I hate it. This winter they will finally be with someone who HAS goat experience which will be a relief, but I'm still going to be pulling my hair out come kidding season. My goats are always into some kind of trouble and I either have to run over to help out or not even find out until later - if there's no one living there that could mean dead goats. I wouldn't go for it unless you can find something adjacent to where you'll be living. 30 minutes is really not a bad commute. If you're wanting to expand anyway maybe you can keep an eye out for something closer that has property and a house.
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Thanks so much, I appreciate it.
It's definitely a tough call. I mean, I am content to stay right here, but I know this offer won't come again and my husband has worked really hard for it.
He's been with the farm for almost 6 years, and has a great relationship with everyone there. They want all of their long time employees to move to the new farm from what I understand (they remodeled 2 smaller, original homes, then built 3 big ones including the one they want us to live in).
My kids like the idea, but not going to school there. They said they'd rather move to the county north of us and go to school there, because they know people there. But where the farm is at they don't know anyone in that entire area.

I definitely don't like the idea of having our animals somewhere else. We currently have 7 Boer does, and 1 young buck. Hopefully all 5 adults will be bred soon, 3 'might' be, but we'll see - Mar/Apr kids. We usually kid in Jan/Feb for babies that my kids can show from June-Aug. So I've been a bit stressed worrying if they are taking or not since we bought a young buck that isn't quite mature minded yet (but he is young and trying). So the upside is, if we make any changes, we have time before goats are due to birth.

My husband is going to express to the owners that we have animals, and that is a big reason we are hesitating on their offer. So we'll see what happens.
I really can't find any land around there for sale in a 'reasonable' price range. It's crazy how expensive the area is. There are usually some small 'hole in the wall' deals to be had, patience is key.
I have lots of ideas we could try 'if' we end up going through with this...

We've lived on a farm, it was before we moved here. That's how we saved up the $$ to pay most of this place off.
We'll sleep on it, and hopefully my husband has a chance to talk to the owners soon. If it doesn't work out, we'll just stay here. We have plenty of things to work on - including getting newer vehicles or at least getting my truck fixed as it hasn't been running quite right since he changed the Distributor cap/plugs.
Always something!
 

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Catharina
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Greybird expresses my thoughts on your dilemma perfectly. Most people in my neighborhood are driving further too. I did want to reassure you that freeway driving is actually a lot safer than using surface streets, because you're not dealing with intersections, oncoming traffic, people parking, pedestrians, stop signs, turns & all that. It might feel scarier because of the speed, but per mile driven you're much less likely to get killed in an accident.

My neighbor's husband sometimes works 5 hours away. He rents a small room somewhere for 2-3 nights a week I think. It's not ideal for their family, but safer than driving tired (& arriving after the kids are asleep anyway.) I have a really over-active imagination, & here's what I'm imagining: a nice camper in a quiet corner of the new farm. Hubby could sleep there if he has to work late, & all of you could go there on weekends. Used campers are amazingly affordable--my daughter just bought one & it's so homey. It even has a little bathtub.

It's an interesting situation to be in. I'd be very unwilling to give up the home I owned for a house that I didn't, but that's just me. Have you looked into how much you could charge someone to rent your home? Then you would have the security of having somewhere to go if the boss goes bankrupt or whatever. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
 

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Thanks for the idea, and the RV is a good one. Unfortunately I don't see that being an option as the farm is pretty upscale, and very professional type. They'd rather him live in the house than in an RV. They have spent 3+ years building. I am pretty sure everything is brand new, except for maybe a few buildings and then a couple of employee houses they had full remodeled. It's a multi million dollar investment.

Trust me, the thought of giving up something we own for something we don't is a big issue. That is why I told my husband we'd have to sell this place and buy a place nearby to keep our animals. We really could use more land, we can't expand our herd, or really do anything more, where we are now. We'll explore our options and see if the owner suggests anything, if not we'll stay where we are, and eventually look for a bigger place when we are ready ;)

For fun, here is the farm, sort of enclosed with the blue and red lines although I think they may actually own more than that.


The house they had built for us looks similar to this one, just slightly different layout. (I think this will be the farm managers house, but not sure)


This is a couple of employee houses they remodeled, each having a 2 car garage


Since the google map images are so old, the houses they are finishing up aren't even on the satellite image lol. But, the house they built for us (and a 2nd one) are in the location on the top right where the dirt/construction site is at.


I love Google maps, haha...

This is our current place (can't miss the goats!), it's not much, just a couple of acres. But I do love living here, just no option to grow :(


Here's an example of why it's hard to find anything in the area of the farm... I mean SERIOUSLY look at those prices! GAH!
 

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It sounds like, if the owners want their employees living onsite, it may put your husband at a disadvantage with them not to do so. Not that it would necessarily put his job at risk, but just that he might not be considered as much for promotions, etc., and maybe more likely to be laid off if the need to lay people off arises in the future. The folks that live onsite and are available 24-7 would naturally be viewed as more "dependable" if that makes sense. He may be opting out of being part of the "core team" if he chooses not to live elsewhere. I just don't think they'd be going to all this expense just to be nice to their employees. They must have decided things would work better for their business this way.

But, giving up your place and having nothing that you own is very scary too. If the money is not reinvested in real estate, for most people it will peter away over the years on this or that and you can be left totally dependent on this horse farm.

If you can keep your place and rent it out to good renters, that would be ideal. It's possible you could find the perfect fit. There are also some really bad tenants out there!

The move doesn't have to be too traumatic for your kids. Yes, it is very hard to leave friends, but you are not going far at all. They could still see their old friends while they make new ones at their new schools.

When I was 11, I moved 3,000 miles away from the only home I'd ever had, and that WAS very hard for me, but if I'd been closer and able to see my old friends every weekend while I made new friends, it wouldn't have been a big deal at all. Sure, I would have whined a bit, but certainly would not have been heartbroken. I'd keep the senior at the old school, of course, and just deal with the daily commute for that year, and since you're going anyway, the sophomore could stay too for that year, and then evaluate the situation next year. He or she may have made some friends in your new area by then and not mind switching.

As far as keeping goats where you don't live, I have had my goats 15 minutes away for the last 6 months. It is a hassle, but not too bad, as long as nothing unusual is going on with them. Milking was hard when I had one in milk, and if one were sick or getting ready to kid, it would be really hard to care for them properly. If my house is not finished being built by kidding time this spring (so I can live on the same property) I will be building them a small pen here at our rental house so I can keep an eye on them, milk them, etc.
 

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Wow! So much to think about, and some very helpful replies!

We have done it, and have raised animals in two different locations/neither of which we live at....our son lives at the farm most of the months of the year however, where most of the animals are....the goats we have raised here are only a few miles away, and believe me they are secured better than a high tech security set up at a state prison! Intense fencing we have, barbed wire on top and bottom, very tall fencing, electric fence....keeping predators out ...knock on wood, has been very very successful and it is due to the intense set up the guys built for them!

Good luck- a lot to think about!
 

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www.wildheartsranch.org
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If the farm is that big is there any chance they'd be willing to set aside space for the goats? They take up a lot less room than horses.
 

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Probably of minor import - but a 30 minute commute is considered very short here. I'd absolutely jump at any appropriate job which was only 30 minutes! Different strokes, I suppose (my commute is an hour and a half each way).

A nice long interstate is not too bad if he can listen to music on the way.

I'd consider moving there, but I suppose I got moved around a lot as a kid and got very used to it.
 

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Discussion Starter #13
Thank You again for all of the input and advice! I've been dealt stressful decision making in the past, but wow, this one tops the cake!

I know the commute isn't that far for my husband. We only live a few miles from the interstate, and the farm isn't too far from the interstate. But if there are any traffic issues (always accidents and issues), that does worry me.

I don't think my husband's job would be affected at all if we didn't move to the farm. Future promotions, however could be affected. Besides the farm manager, my husband is the most experienced horseman on the farm.
This job is very demanding, it's not a 5 day/40hr work week. It's 6 days/48hr, and during the winter/spring months my husband works 6 nights/11hr shifts, sometimes 7 nights. Now with a bigger farm, I am sure they will be prepping their own horses for the major fall sales, and yearlings alone require intensive care, training, grooming and routine. They come in at 7am, and don't go back out until 7pm which means, instead of coming home for a few hours then going and turning out, he'd have to stay there. Biggest thing too.... if there is an emergency that my husband could be needed, he wouldn't be close enough to get there quickly. :faint::dazed::hammer:

It would be neat to have a little place there for the goats, but I don't think it would happen. Plus, we'd have to have a few different pens, and a barn. Basically, a similar setup to what we have here at the minimum.

We'll keep looking for a place closer, and keep our options open, but it will probably be a few weeks before we really know what we will do. That's the hard part. But one of the owners is across the country right now from my understanding, and the other owner should be going soon (they have a horse running in a BIG race very soon, very big deal :) ).

We really need to work on sprucing this place up IMO, and my friend suggested having an appraisal done so we can get an idea of what it might be worth if we sell.

Sadly, I doubt we'd rent it out, because my husband has relatives that would insist on getting it and it's already been hinted they'd think they could live here for free and only pay bills. Uh, No. We don't want to rent it out then something need to be fixed, something else goes wrong, etc. etc. plus paying the property taxes.
The only way we'd sell is if we had something else lined up. My husband is also a major saver, so no worries about wasting $$ :)
 

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Fair-Haven
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Smart thinking on the last part. Relatives and business transactions rarely turn out well.

I gather your husband is working for a TB farm - completely understand that - I'm a long time horse person of 30 years. With foaling, fitting, and training I do understand why the employers would want people on site - and yes they would probably get first consideration in promotions.

Difficult decision for all of you - but trust in the end it will work out. A new adventure in the journey of life!

Again, best wishes, let us know how it works out.
 

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What is the name of the farm your husband works at? Who's the horse running in a big race? I'm sorry, I know that's not what this thread is about, but I love horse racing, so of course, this peaked my interest!
 

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Smart thinking on the last part. Relatives and business transactions rarely turn out well.

I gather your husband is working for a TB farm - completely understand that - I'm a long time horse person of 30 years. With foaling, fitting, and training I do understand why the employers would want people on site - and yes they would probably get first consideration in promotions.

Difficult decision for all of you - but trust in the end it will work out. A new adventure in the journey of life!

Again, best wishes, let us know how it works out.
Thank You. Yes, he works with TB's and loves his job. He's worked for a few different farms and has about 20 years experience. He's been with this farm going on 6 years, and loves working for them. They really treat him well (and us), and we feel very blessed ♥
Right now we live in Versailles, but the farm is moving very near the Kentucky Horse Park.

The good thing is, we don't have to rush into anything yet. We do have some time to figure it out. He asked me what he should tell them, and I told him, to just tell them we need to be able to find a place for our goats with a similar set up to what we have now.
 

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Look over in Paris for property. It's pretty close to the horse park, or over in Ruddles Mill. It's a tiny town, but you may find something. Best of luck in your decision and future!
 

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Just curious.... could you ask your husbands boss if there is a possibility of you bringing in your animals with you? Just a thought! That would be difficult....
 

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Thanks so much! It's still in the works and thankfully we have time to figure things out. It will be another couple of weeks I'm sure before my husband can talk to them about it.

The problem with bringing the goats to the farm would definitely be having a setup that works for us. So even if they offered, there just really isn't a way to do it without it being a fuss for the owners (IMO). We need a barn, we need at least 3 pens/paddocks, similar to what we have now.

I am really having a tough time with this. I know change is okay, and sometimes it's definitely worth taking the chance. But in my heart, I have to admit, I love our county, I love this area. It's 'comfortable,' and feels right.
I am honestly very nervous about all of this. Thankfully, the way my husband talked, we have time, there's no rush.

I actually have been looking in southern part of Paris/Bourbon co. but we don't want to go any further than that. My kids want us to go to Scott co. but I don't think we can find anything close enough.

I guess a good thing could be, depending on the setup, location, etc. I possibly know someone we could get to live on the property that would look after the animals for us when we're not there. Very trustworthy person that I've known almost my entire life. So, we'll just keep that idea as an option.
 

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I learned from my parents to work hard for what I want and not ask for handouts. I am a project management assistant for a construction company during the day and a warehouse associate during at night. It gets very difficult, but nothing good comes easy and I'm gonna work hard to accomplish my goals for as long as the Lord allows me to.
 
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